Read the collected works of Willa Cather.
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My Antoniaby Willa Cather
(1875-1947)
Introduction
| Book 1
- The Shimerdas - Chapters: 1 | 2
| 3 | 4
| 5 | 6
| 7 | 8
| 9 | 10
| 11 | 12
| 13 | 14
| 15 | 16
| 17 | 18
| 19 | Book 2 - The Hired Girls
- Chapters: 1 | 2
| 3 | 4
| 5 | 6
| 7 | 8
| 9 | 10
| 11 | 12
| 13 | 14
| 15 | Book 3 - Lena Lingard - Chapters:
1 | 2
| 3 | 4
| Book 4 - The Pioneer Woman's Story - Chapters: 1
| 2 | 3
| 4 | Book 5 - Cuzak's Boys - Chapters:
1 | 2
| 3 |
Book 5: Cuzak's
Boys
Chapter 1
I TOLD ANTONIA
I would come back, but life intervened, and it was twenty years before I kept
my promise. I heard of her from time to time; that she married, very soon after
I last saw her, a young Bohemian, a cousin of Anton Jelinek; that they were
poor, and had a large family. Once when I was abroad I went into Bohemia, and
from Prague I sent Antonia some photographs of her native village. Months afterward
came a letter from her, telling me the names and ages of her many children,
but little else; signed, `Your old friend, Antonia Cuzak.' When I met Tiny Soderball
in Salt Lake, she told me that Antonia had not `done very well'; that her husband
was not a man of much force, and she had had a hard life. Perhaps it was cowardice
that kept me away so long. My business took me West several times every year,
and it was always in the back of my mind that I would stop in Nebraska some
day and go to see Antonia. But I kept putting it off until the next trip. I
did not want to find her aged and broken; I really dreaded it. In the course
of twenty crowded years one parts with many illusions. I did not wish to lose
the early ones. Some memories are realities, and are better than anything that
can ever happen to one again.
I owe it to Lena
Lingard that I went to see Antonia at last. I was in San Francisco two summers
ago when both Lena and Tiny Soderball were in town. Tiny lives in a house of
her own, and Lena's shop is in an apartment house just around the corner. It
interested me, after so many years, to see the two women together. Tiny audits
Lena's accounts occasionally, and invests her money for her; and Lena, apparently,
takes care that Tiny doesn't grow too miserly. `If there's anything I can't
stand,' she said to me in Tiny's presence, `it's a shabby rich woman.' Tiny
smiled grimly and assured me that Lena would never be either shabby or rich.
`And I don't want to be,' the other agreed complacently.
Lena gave me a
cheerful account of Antonia and urged me to make her a visit.
`You really ought
to go, Jim. It would be such a satisfaction to her. Never mind what Tiny says.
There's nothing the matter with Cuzak. You'd like him. He isn't a hustler, but
a rough man would never have suited Tony. Tony has nice children--ten or eleven
of them by this time, I guess. I shouldn't care for a family of that size myself,
but somehow it's just right for Tony. She'd love to show them to you.'
On my way East
I broke my journey at Hastings, in Nebraska, and set off with an open buggy
and a fairly good livery team to find the Cuzak farm. At a little past midday,
I knew I must be nearing my destination. Set back on a swell of land at my right,
I saw a wide farm-house, with a red barn and an ash grove, and cattle-yards
in front that sloped down to the highroad. I drew up my horses and was wondering
whether I should drive in here, when I heard low voices. Ahead of me, in a plum
thicket beside the road, I saw two boys bending over a dead dog. The little
one, not more than four or five, was on his knees, his hands folded, and his
close-clipped, bare head drooping forward in deep dejection. The other stood
beside him, a hand on his shoulder, and was comforting him in a language I had
not heard for a long while. When I stopped my horses opposite them, the older
boy took his brother by the hand and came toward me. He, too, looked grave.
This was evidently a sad afternoon for them.
`Are you Mrs. Cuzak's
boys?' I asked.
The younger one
did not look up; he was submerged in his own feelings, but his brother met me
with intelligent grey eyes. `Yes, sir.'
`Does she live
up there on the hill? I am going to see her. Get in and ride up with me.'
He glanced at his
reluctant little brother. `I guess we'd better walk. But we'll open the gate
for you.'
I drove along the
side-road and they followed slowly behind. When I pulled up at the windmill,
another boy, barefooted and curly-headed, ran out of the barn to tie my team
for me. He was a handsome one, this chap, fair-skinned and freckled, with red
cheeks and a ruddy pelt as thick as a lamb's wool, growing down on his neck
in little tufts. He tied my team with two flourishes of his hands, and nodded
when I asked him if his mother was at home. As he glanced at me, his face dimpled
with a seizure of irrelevant merriment, and he shot up the windmill tower with
a lightness that struck me as disdainful. I knew he was peering down at me as
I walked toward the house.
Ducks and geese
ran quacking across my path. White cats were sunning themselves among yellow
pumpkins on the porch steps. I looked through the wire screen into a big, light
kitchen with a white floor. I saw a long table, rows of wooden chairs against
the wall, and a shining range in one corner. Two girls were washing dishes at
the sink, laughing and chattering, and a little one, in a short pinafore, sat
on a stool playing with a rag baby. When I asked for their mother, one of the
girls dropped her towel, ran across the floor with noiseless bare feet, and
disappeared. The older one, who wore shoes and stockings, came to the door to
admit me. She was a buxom girl with dark hair and eyes, calm and self-possessed.
`Won't you come
in? Mother will be here in a minute.'
Before I could sit down
in the chair she offered me, the miracle happened; one of those quiet moments
that clutch the heart, and take more courage than the noisy, excited passages
in life. Antonia came in and stood before me; a stalwart, brown woman, flat-chested,
her curly brown hair a little grizzled. It was a shock, of course. It always
is, to meet people after long years, especially if they have lived as much and
as hard as this woman had. We stood looking at each other. The eyes that peered
anxiously at me were--simply Antonia's eyes. I had seen no others like them
since I looked into them last, though I had looked at so many thousands of human
faces. As I confronted her, the changes grew less apparent to me, her identity
stronger. She was there, in the full vigour of her personality, battered but
not diminished, looking at me, speaking to me in the husky, breathy voice I
remembered so well.
`My husband's not
at home, sir. Can I do anything?'
`Don't you remember
me, Antonia? Have I changed so much?'
She frowned into
the slanting sunlight that made her brown hair look redder than it was. Suddenly
her eyes widened, her whole face seemed to grow broader. She caught her breath
and put out two hard-worked hands.
`Why, it's Jim!
Anna, Yulka, it's Jim Burden!' She had no sooner caught my hands than she looked
alarmed. `What's happened? Is anybody dead?'
I patted her arm.
`No. I didn't come
to a funeral this time. I got off the train at Hastings and drove down to see
you and your family.'
She dropped my
hand and began rushing about. `Anton, Yulka, Nina, where are you all? Run, Anna,
and hunt for the boys. They're off looking for that dog, somewhere. And call
Leo. Where is that Leo!' She pulled them out of corners and came bringing them
like a mother cat bringing in her kittens. `You don't have to go right off,
Jim? My oldest boy's not here. He's gone with papa to the street fair at Wilber.
I won't let you go! You've got to stay and see Rudolph and our papa.' She looked
at me imploringly, panting with excitement.
While I reassured
her and told her there would be plenty of time, the barefooted boys from outside
were slipping into the kitchen and gathering about her.
`Now, tell me their
names, and how old they are.'
As she told them
off in turn, she made several mistakes about ages, and they roared with laughter.
When she came to my light-footed friend of the windmill, she said, `This is
Leo, and he's old enough to be better than he is.'
He ran up to her
and butted her playfully with his curly head, like a little ram, but his voice
was quite desperate. `You've forgot! You always forget mine. It's mean! Please
tell him, mother!' He clenched his fists in vexation and looked up at her impetuously.
She wound her forefinger
in his yellow fleece and pulled it, watching him. `Well, how old are you?'
`I'm twelve,' he
panted, looking not at me but at her; `I'm twelve years old, and I was born
on Easter Day!'
She nodded to me.
`It's true. He was an Easter baby.'
The children all
looked at me, as if they expected me to exhibit astonishment or delight at this
information. Clearly, they were proud of each other, and of being so many. When
they had all been introduced, Anna, the eldest daughter, who had met me at the
door, scattered them gently, and came bringing a white apron which she tied
round her mother's waist.
`Now, mother, sit
down and talk to Mr. Burden. We'll finish the dishes quietly and not disturb
you.'
Antonia looked
about, quite distracted. `Yes, child, but why don't we take him into the parlour,
now that we've got a nice parlour for company?'
The daughter laughed
indulgently, and took my hat from me. `Well, you're here, now, mother, and if
you talk here, Yulka and I can listen, too. You can show him the parlour after
while.' She smiled at me, and went back to the dishes, with her sister. The
little girl with the rag doll found a place on the bottom step of an enclosed
back stairway, and sat with her toes curled up, looking out at us expectantly.
`She's Nina, after
Nina Harling,' Antonia explained. `Ain't her eyes like Nina's? I declare, Jim,
I loved you children almost as much as I love my own. These children know all
about you and Charley and Sally, like as if they'd grown up with you. I can't
think of what I want to say, you've got me so stirred up. And then, I've forgot
my English so. I don't often talk it any more. I tell the children I used to
speak real well.' She said they always spoke Bohemian at home. The little ones
could not speak English at all--didn't learn it until they went to school.
`I can't believe
it's you, sitting here, in my own kitchen. You wouldn't have known me, would
you, Jim? You've kept so young, yourself. But it's easier for a man. I can't
see how my Anton looks any older than the day I married him. His teeth have
kept so nice. I haven't got many left. But I feel just as young as I used to,
and I can do as much work. Oh, we don't have to work so hard now! We've got
plenty to help us, papa and me. And how many have you got, Jim?'
When I told her
I had no children, she seemed embarrassed. `Oh, ain't that too bad! Maybe you
could take one of my bad ones, now? That Leo; he's the worst of all.' She leaned
toward me with a smile. `And I love him the best,' she whispered.
`Mother!' the two
girls murmured reproachfully from the dishes.
Antonia threw up
her head and laughed. `I can't help it. You know I do. Maybe it's because he
came on Easter Day, I don't know. And he's never out of mischief one minute!'
I was thinking,
as I watched her, how little it mattered-- about her teeth, for instance. I
know so many women who have kept all the things that she had lost, but whose
inner glow has faded. Whatever else was gone, Antonia had not lost the fire
of life. Her skin, so brown and hardened, had not that look of flabbiness, as
if the sap beneath it had been secretly drawn away.
While we were talking,
the little boy whom they called Jan came in and sat down on the step beside
Nina, under the hood of the stairway. He wore a funny long gingham apron, like
a smock, over his trousers, and his hair was clipped so short that his head
looked white and naked. He watched us out of his big, sorrowful grey eyes.
`He wants to tell
you about the dog, mother. They found it dead,' Anna said, as she passed us
on her way to the cupboard.
Antonia beckoned
the boy to her. He stood by her chair, leaning his elbows on her knees and twisting
her apron strings in his slender fingers, while he told her his story softly
in Bohemian, and the tears brimmed over and hung on his long lashes. His mother
listened, spoke soothingly to him and in a whisper promised him something that
made him give her a quick, teary smile. He slipped away and whispered his secret
to Nina, sitting close to her and talking behind his hand.
When Anna finished
her work and had washed her hands, she came and stood behind her mother's chair.
`Why don't we show Mr. Burden our new fruit cave?' she asked.
We started off
across the yard with the children at our heels. The boys were standing by the
windmill, talking about the dog; some of them ran ahead to open the cellar door.
When we descended, they all came down after us, and seemed quite as proud of
the cave as the girls were.
Ambrosch, the thoughtful-looking
one who had directed me down by the plum bushes, called my attention to the
stout brick walls and the cement floor. `Yes, it is a good way from the house,'
he admitted. `But, you see, in winter there are nearly always some of us around
to come out and get things.'
Anna and Yulka
showed me three small barrels; one full of dill pickles, one full of chopped
pickles, and one full of pickled watermelon rinds.
`You wouldn't believe,
Jim, what it takes to feed them all!' their mother exclaimed. `You ought to
see the bread we bake on Wednesdays and Saturdays! It's no wonder their poor
papa can't get rich, he has to buy so much sugar for us to preserve with. We
have our own wheat ground for flour--but then there's that much less to sell.'
Nina and Jan, and
a little girl named Lucie, kept shyly pointing out to me the shelves of glass
jars. They said nothing, but, glancing at me, traced on the glass with their
finger-tips the outline of the cherries and strawberries and crabapples within,
trying by a blissful expression of countenance to give me some idea of their
deliciousness.
`Show him the spiced
plums, mother. Americans don't have those,' said one of the older boys. `Mother
uses them to make kolaches,' he added.
Leo, in a low voice,
tossed off some scornful remark in Bohemian.
I turned to him.
`You think I don't know what kolaches are, eh? You're mistaken, young man. I've
eaten your mother's kolaches long before that Easter Day when you were born.'
`Always too fresh,
Leo,' Ambrosch remarked with a shrug.
Leo dived behind
his mother and grinned out at me.
We turned to leave
the cave; Antonia and I went up the stairs first, and the children waited. We
were standing outside talking, when they all came running up the steps together,
big and little, tow heads and gold heads and brown, and flashing little naked
legs; a veritable explosion of life out of the dark cave into the sunlight.
It made me dizzy for a moment.
The boys escorted
us to the front of the house, which I hadn't yet seen; in farm-houses, somehow,
life comes and goes by the back door. The roof was so steep that the eaves were
not much above the forest of tall hollyhocks, now brown and in seed. Through
July, Antonia said, the house was buried in them; the Bohemians, I remembered,
always planted hollyhocks. The front yard was enclosed by a thorny locust hedge,
and at the gate grew two silvery, mothlike trees of the mimosa family. From
here one looked down over the cattle-yards, with their two long ponds, and over
a wide stretch of stubble which they told me was a ryefield in summer.
At some distance
behind the house were an ash grove and two orchards: a cherry orchard, with
gooseberry and currant bushes between the rows, and an apple orchard, sheltered
by a high hedge from the hot winds. The older children turned back when we reached
the hedge, but Jan and Nina and Lucie crept through it by a hole known only
to themselves and hid under the low-branching mulberry bushes.
As we walked through
the apple orchard, grown up in tall bluegrass, Antonia kept stopping to tell
me about one tree and another. `I love them as if they were people,' she said,
rubbing her hand over the bark. `There wasn't a tree here when we first came.
We planted every one, and used to carry water for them, too--after we'd been
working in the fields all day. Anton, he was a city man, and he used to get
discouraged. But I couldn't feel so tired that I wouldn't fret about these trees
when there was a dry time. They were on my mind like children. Many a night
after he was asleep I've got up and come out and carried water to the poor things.
And now, you see, we have the good of them. My man worked in the orange groves
in Florida, and he knows all about grafting. There ain't one of our neighbours
has an orchard that bears like ours.'
In the middle of
the orchard we came upon a grape arbour, with seats built along the sides and
a warped plank table. The three children were waiting for us there. They looked
up at me bashfully and made some request of their mother.
`They want me to
tell you how the teacher has the school picnic here every year. These don't
go to school yet, so they think it's all like the picnic.'
After I had admired
the arbour sufficiently, the youngsters ran away to an open place where there
was a rough jungle of French pinks, and squatted down among them, crawling about
and measuring with a string.
`Jan wants to bury
his dog there,' Antonia explained. `I had to tell him he could. He's kind of
like Nina Harling; you remember how hard she used to take little things? He
has funny notions, like her.'
We sat down and
watched them. Antonia leaned her elbows on the table. There was the deepest
peace in that orchard. It was surrounded by a triple enclosure; the wire fence,
then the hedge of thorny locusts, then the mulberry hedge which kept out the
hot winds of summer and held fast to the protecting snows of winter. The hedges
were so tall that we could see nothing but the blue sky above them, neither
the barn roof nor the windmill. The afternoon sun poured down on us through
the drying grape leaves. The orchard seemed full of sun, like a cup, and we
could smell the ripe apples on the trees. The crabs hung on the branches as
thick as beads on a string, purple-red, with a thin silvery glaze over them.
Some hens and ducks had crept through the hedge and were pecking at the fallen
apples. The drakes were handsome fellows, with pinkish grey bodies, their heads
and necks covered with iridescent green feathers which grew close and full,
changing to blue like a peacock's neck. Antonia said they always reminded her
of soldiers--some uniform she had seen in the old country, when she was a child.
`Are there any
quail left now?' I asked. I reminded her how she used to go hunting with me
the last summer before we moved to town. `You weren't a bad shot, Tony. Do you
remember how you used to want to run away and go for ducks with Charley Harling
and me?'
`I know, but I'm
afraid to look at a gun now.' She picked up one of the drakes and ruffled his
green capote with her fingers. `Ever since I've had children, I don't like to
kill anything. It makes me kind of faint to wring an old goose's neck. Ain't
that strange, Jim?'
`I don't know.
The young Queen of Italy said the same thing once, to a friend of mine. She
used to be a great huntswoman, but now she feels as you do, and only shoots
clay pigeons.'
`Then I'm sure
she's a good mother,' Antonia said warmly.
She told me how
she and her husband had come out to this new country when the farm-land was
cheap and could be had on easy payments. The first ten years were a hard struggle.
Her husband knew very little about farming and often grew discouraged. `We'd
never have got through if I hadn't been so strong. I've always had good health,
thank God, and I was able to help him in the fields until right up to the time
before my babies came. Our children were good about taking care of each other.
Martha, the one you saw when she was a baby, was such a help to me, and she
trained Anna to be just like her. My Martha's married now, and has a baby of
her own. Think of that, Jim!
`No, I never got
down-hearted. Anton's a good man, and I loved my children and always believed
they would turn out well. I belong on a farm. I'm never lonesome here like I
used to be in town. You remember what sad spells I used to have, when I didn't
know what was the matter with me? I've never had them out here. And I don't
mind work a bit, if I don't have to put up with sadness.' She leaned her chin
on her hand and looked down through the orchard, where the sunlight was growing
more and more golden.
`You ought never
to have gone to town, Tony,' I said, wondering at her.
She turned to me
eagerly.
`Oh, I'm glad I
went! I'd never have known anything about cooking or housekeeping if I hadn't.
I learned nice ways at the Harlings', and I've been able to bring my children
up so much better. Don't you think they are pretty well-behaved for country
children? If it hadn't been for what Mrs. Harling taught me, I expect I'd have
brought them up like wild rabbits. No, I'm glad I had a chance to learn; but
I'm thankful none of my daughters will ever have to work out. The trouble with
me was, Jim, I never could believe harm of anybody I loved.'
While we were talking,
Antonia assured me that she could keep me for the night. `We've plenty of room.
Two of the boys sleep in the haymow till cold weather comes, but there's no
need for it. Leo always begs to sleep there, and Ambrosch goes along to look
after him.'
I told her I would
like to sleep in the haymow, with the boys.
`You can do just
as you want to. The chest is full of clean blankets, put away for winter. Now
I must go, or my girls will be doing all the work, and I want to cook your supper
myself.'
As we went toward
the house, we met Ambrosch and Anton, starting off with their milking-pails
to hunt the cows. I joined them, and Leo accompanied us at some distance, running
ahead and starting up at us out of clumps of ironweed, calling, `I'm a jack
rabbit,' or, `I'm a big bull-snake.'
I walked between
the two older boys--straight, well-made fellows, with good heads and clear eyes.
They talked about their school and the new teacher, told me about the crops
and the harvest, and how many steers they would feed that winter. They were
easy and confidential with me, as if I were an old friend of the family-- and
not too old. I felt like a boy in their company, and all manner of forgotten
interests revived in me. It seemed, after all, so natural to be walking along
a barbed-wire fence beside the sunset, toward a red pond, and to see my shadow
moving along at my right, over the close-cropped grass.
`Has mother shown
you the pictures you sent her from the old country?' Ambrosch asked. `We've
had them framed and they're hung up in the parlour. She was so glad to get them.
I don't believe I ever saw her so pleased about anything.' There was a note
of simple gratitude in his voice that made me wish I had given more occasion
for it.
I put my hand on
his shoulder. `Your mother, you know, was very much loved by all of us. She
was a beautiful girl.'
`Oh, we know!'
They both spoke together; seemed a little surprised that I should think it necessary
to mention this. `Everybody liked her, didn't they? The Harlings and your grandmother,
and all the town people.'
`Sometimes,' I
ventured, `it doesn't occur to boys that their mother was ever young and pretty.'
`Oh, we know!'
they said again, warmly. `She's not very old now,' Ambrosch added. `Not much
older than you.'
`Well,' I said,
`if you weren't nice to her, I think I'd take a club and go for the whole lot
of you. I couldn't stand it if you boys were inconsiderate, or thought of her
as if she were just somebody who looked after you. You see I was very much in
love with your mother once, and I know there's nobody like her.'
The boys laughed
and seemed pleased and embarrassed.
`She never told
us that,' said Anton. `But she's always talked lots about you, and about what
good times you used to have. She has a picture of you that she cut out of the
Chicago paper once, and Leo says he recognized you when you drove up to the
windmill. You can't tell about Leo, though; sometimes he likes to be smart.'
We brought the
cows home to the corner nearest the barn, and the boys milked them while night
came on. Everything was as it should be: the strong smell of sunflowers and
ironweed in the dew, the clear blue and gold of the sky, the evening star, the
purr of the milk into the pails, the grunts and squeals of the pigs fighting
over their supper. I began to feel the loneliness of the farm-boy at evening,
when the chores seem everlastingly the same, and the world so far away.
What a tableful
we were at supper: two long rows of restless heads in the lamplight, and so
many eyes fastened excitedly upon Antonia as she sat at the head of the table,
filling the plates and starting the dishes on their way. The children were seated
according to a system; a little one next an older one, who was to watch over
his behaviour and to see that he got his food. Anna and Yulka left their chairs
from time to time to bring fresh plates of kolaches and pitchers of milk.
After supper we
went into the parlour, so that Yulka and Leo could play for me. Antonia went
first, carrying the lamp. There were not nearly chairs enough to go round, so
the younger children sat down on the bare floor. Little Lucie whispered to me
that they were going to have a parlour carpet if they got ninety cents for their
wheat. Leo, with a good deal of fussing, got out his violin. It was old Mr.
Shimerda's instrument, which Antonia had always kept, and it was too big for
him. But he played very well for a self-taught boy. Poor Yulka's efforts were
not so successful. While they were playing, little Nina got up from her corner,
came out into the middle of the floor, and began to do a pretty little dance
on the boards with her bare feet. No one paid the least attention to her, and
when she was through she stole back and sat down by her brother.
Antonia spoke to
Leo in Bohemian. He frowned and wrinkled up his face. He seemed to be trying
to pout, but his attempt only brought out dimples in unusual places. After twisting
and screwing the keys, he played some Bohemian airs, without the organ to hold
him back, and that went better. The boy was so restless that I had not had a
chance to look at his face before. My first impression was right; he really
was faun-like. He hadn't much head behind his ears, and his tawny fleece grew
down thick to the back of his neck. His eyes were not frank and wide apart like
those of the other boys, but were deep-set, gold-green in colour, and seemed
sensitive to the light. His mother said he got hurt oftener than all the others
put together. He was always trying to ride the colts before they were broken,
teasing the turkey gobbler, seeing just how much red the bull would stand for,
or how sharp the new axe was.
After the concert
was over, Antonia brought out a big boxful of photographs: she and Anton in
their wedding clothes, holding hands; her brother Ambrosch and his very fat
wife, who had a farm of her own, and who bossed her husband, I was delighted
to hear; the three Bohemian Marys and their large families.
`You wouldn't believe
how steady those girls have turned out,' Antonia remarked. `Mary Svoboda's the
best butter-maker in all this country, and a fine manager. Her children will
have a grand chance.'
As Antonia turned
over the pictures the young Cuzaks stood behind her chair, looking over her
shoulder with interested faces. Nina and Jan, after trying to see round the
taller ones, quietly brought a chair, climbed up on it, and stood close together,
looking. The little boy forgot his shyness and grinned delightedly when familiar
faces came into view. In the group about Antonia I was conscious of a kind of
physical harmony. They leaned this way and that, and were not afraid to touch
each other. They contemplated the photographs with pleased recognition; looked
at some admiringly, as if these characters in their mother's girlhood had been
remarkable people. The little children, who could not speak English, murmured
comments to each other in their rich old language.
Antonia held out
a photograph of Lena that had come from San Francisco last Christmas. `Does
she still look like that? She hasn't been home for six years now.' Yes, it was
exactly like Lena, I told her; a comely woman, a trifle too plump, in a hat
a trifle too large, but with the old lazy eyes, and the old dimpled ingenuousness
still lurking at the corners of her mouth.
There was a picture
of Frances Harling in a befrogged riding costume that I remembered well. `Isn't
she fine!' the girls murmured. They all assented. One could see that Frances
had come down as a heroine in the family legend. Only Leo was unmoved.
`And there's Mr.
Harling, in his grand fur coat. He was awfully rich, wasn't he, mother?'
`He wasn't any
Rockefeller,' put in Master Leo, in a very low tone, which reminded me of the
way in which Mrs. Shimerda had once said that my grandfather `wasn't Jesus.'
His habitual scepticism was like a direct inheritance from that old woman.
`None of your smart
speeches,' said Ambrosch severely.
Leo poked out a
supple red tongue at him, but a moment later broke into a giggle at a tintype
of two men, uncomfortably seated, with an awkward-looking boy in baggy clothes
standing between them: Jake and Otto and I! We had it taken, I remembered, when
we went to Black Hawk on the first Fourth of July I spent in Nebraska. I was
glad to see Jake's grin again, and Otto's ferocious moustaches. The young Cuzaks
knew all about them. `He made grandfather's coffin, didn't he?' Anton asked.
`Wasn't they good
fellows, Jim?' Antonia's eyes filled. `To this day I'm ashamed because I quarrelled
with Jake that way. I was saucy and impertinent to him, Leo, like you are with
people sometimes, and I wish somebody had made me behave.'
`We aren't through
with you, yet,' they warned me. They produced a photograph taken just before
I went away to college: a tall youth in striped trousers and a straw hat, trying
to look easy and jaunty.
`Tell us, Mr. Burden,' said
Charley, `about the rattler you killed at the dog-town. How long was he? Sometimes
mother says six feet and sometimes she says five.'
These children seemed to
be upon very much the same terms with Antonia as the Harling children had been
so many years before. They seemed to feel the same pride in her, and to look
to her for stories and entertainment as we used to do.
It was eleven o'clock when
I at last took my bag and some blankets and started for the barn with the boys.
Their mother came to the door with us, and we tarried for a moment to look out
at the white slope of the corral and the two ponds asleep in the moonlight,
and the long sweep of the pasture under the star-sprinkled sky.
The boys told me to choose
my own place in the haymow, and I lay down before a big window, left open in
warm weather, that looked out into the stars. Ambrosch and Leo cuddled up in
a hay-cave, back under the eaves, and lay giggling and whispering. They tickled
each other and tossed and tumbled in the hay; and then, all at once, as if they
had been shot, they were still. There was hardly a minute between giggles and
bland slumber.
I lay awake for a long while,
until the slow-moving moon passed my window on its way up the heavens. I was
thinking about Antonia and her children; about Anna's solicitude for her, Ambrosch's
grave affection, Leo's jealous, animal little love. That moment, when they all
came tumbling out of the cave into the light, was a sight any man might have
come far to see. Antonia had always been one to leave images in the mind that
did not fade--that grew stronger with time. In my memory there was a succession
of such pictures, fixed there like the old woodcuts of one's first primer: Antonia
kicking her bare legs against the sides of my pony when we came home in triumph
with our snake; Antonia in her black shawl and fur cap, as she stood by her
father's grave in the snowstorm; Antonia coming in with her work-team along
the evening sky-line. She lent herself to immemorial human attitudes which we
recognize by instinct as universal and true. I had not been mistaken. She was
a battered woman now, not a lovely girl; but she still had that something which
fires the imagination, could still stop one's breath for a moment by a look
or gesture that somehow revealed the meaning in common things. She had only
to stand in the orchard, to put her hand on a little crab tree and look up at
the apples, to make you feel the goodness of planting and tending and harvesting
at last. All the strong things of her heart came out in her body, that had been
so tireless in serving generous emotions.
It was no wonder that her
sons stood tall and straight. She was a rich mine of life, like the founders
of early races.
Introduction
| Book 1
- The Shimerdas - Chapters: 1 | 2
| 3 | 4
| 5 | 6
| 7 | 8
| 9 | 10
| 11 | 12
| 13 | 14
| 15 | 16
| 17 | 18
| 19 | Book 2 - The Hired Girls
- Chapters: 1 | 2
| 3 | 4
| 5 | 6
| 7 | 8
| 9 | 10
| 11 | 12
| 13 | 14
| 15 | Book 3 - Lena Lingard - Chapters:
1 | 2
| 3 | 4
| Book 4 - The Pioneer Woman's Story - Chapters: 1
| 2 | 3
| 4 | Book 5 - Cuzak's Boys - Chapters:
1 | 2
| 3 |